Cold, Warm, White, Black
by Almandine-Azaleea
Summary: One rainy day Anzu asks someone for a favour of sorts one that leaves them rather flabbergasted. Angst, fluff, but overall just azureshipping.
1. Cold

**Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh! End of discussion!**

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**Cold, Warm, White, Black**

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Sheets of water hurled themselves against the cold window panes. The hallways of the school were empty, abandoned- like ghost towns in Westerns.

Angry clouds fought for supremacy outside the dreary walls of the building. A lick of lightning split the sky, illuminating the dim hallway, and throwing the shadows of the two people present

before them.

"Get out of my way, Mazaki."

The girl in question refused to move. He made to avoid her and was surprised when a small hand gripped tightly onto his arm.

"I suggest you let go right now, Mazaki. I do not want your filthy presence all over me." She held tighter. He winced- she wasn't as gentle as she looked.

"Kaiba-kun" her voice almost disappeared in the din of the furiously rapping rain.

He tried to shake her off, but she tightened her grip further.

"Teach me!" she half-growled.

Kaiba looked at her, trying to fathom what she was talking about. He noticed her head was bent and her eyes were covered by thick dark bangs from under which tears were running silently.

An uncomfortable sensation tiptoed up his spine...almost like a shiver. Why was Mazaki crying?

He had never been one to deal well with tears, so his mind hinted that perhaps a good next step would be to ask what was the matter. She beat him to it again.

"Teach me Kaiba-kun!" she asked more forcibly.

"Teach you Mazaki? Why would I waste my time teaching you? And teach you what?" his reply mirrored her own anger.

"Teach me to be like you." she whispered.

An unspoken and indefinite emotion welled up in him...something suspiciously resembling surprise, but that couldn't be right. Seto Kaiba was never surprised, never caught off guard. Never!

"So?" she asked once more.

"What? You think I'll give away my trade secrets because you're performing a pathetic display of emotion?"

She smiled bitterly.

"I don't want you stupid company! I don't care about your' trade secrets'! I want to be like you!"

No, he was definitely not surprised...shocked would have been a more appropriate term.

"You have got no idea what I am like Mazaki!"

"Teach me anyway! I want to be cold, to not care, to be shielded...like you."

This wasn't right. He hadn't wanted to turn out cold...hadn't meant to end up 'shielded' and uncaring, the way he had...it was just a mode of survival: his and his brother's lives at the cost of his

humanity...of his heart. And he had never regretted it...until this moment.

"Mazaki! Do not ask about things you know nothing about! You have no idea what I had to do..."

"Tell me!" she cut him short "Teach me how NOT to feel Kaiba."

"Mazaki. You are being irrational. Go home. Watch a movie. Sleep. Tomorrow you'll wake up and realize how stupid you were sounding today."

She let go of his arm then, her tears never stopping their flow.

"I thought you of all people would understand!"

"Understand what, Mazaki?"

"The need to not feel. To not let anyone else close, so they can never ever hurt you! Ever!"

"Is this about the midget?"

"Damn you Kaiba! I thought you of all people would be glad at the thought of not hearing anymore friendship and sunshine speeches!"

"And since when do you care what I think?"

She flinched.

"You see Mazaki- to be like this is to not care what people think, to not care about what others want you to be or think you should be. I thought you already knew how to do that."

"I hate you!" she tried to storm off, and both were surprised when he reached a hand to stop her.

"Mazaki. What happened?"

"None of your business!"

"Really? So out of the blue you've decided to just become like me? I had no idea I was so admired!" his voice cut through her-she almost expected to bleed.

"If I don't feel then I can't be used...I can't be hurt. If I don't let people get close, then no-one will...and I won't ever have to feel this again." her voice was a drawn whisper.

He flinched.

"I thought so too..." he said almost wistfully.

"What?"

"Nevermind. You can't become like me, Mazaki!"

"And why not? Am I not good enough? Smart enough? I won't understand your complexities?"

Come to think about it, she was doing a rather accurate impression of him.

"No."

"Then why?"

"Because I won't let you Mazaki!" he growled. "It's not you!"

He couldn't. He just couldn't let her become like him.

"And what, pray tell, is me? What? An emotional idiot who really should be counted as having a negative IQ for all the times she fell for her own friendship-infused delusions? An untiring

pillow for other people to cry on? An incessant fountain of friendship speeches? A mindless cheerleader who keeps doing the same things even though she knows how it will all end? What?"

His heart almost trembled for a moment at hearing his own words coming out of her mouth. He had always been hard on everyone...and especially on her.

It was his mask, his role: to play the coldhearted villain who cared for none outside his own person-with the sole exception of his brother.

A role it seemed he had played all too well. She had believed him, given up on searching for the seams of his mask and took him as he had intended to show himself from the start.

He never thought it would happen. Never thought that she, of all, would want to seek solace in his darkness.

Bitterly, he acknowledged he had always wanted to find shelter in her light- the light she was so eager to extinguish.

He would not allow it.

"No. You are a person with a heart too big for her own good; who takes everyone's safety and happiness to be her duty to upkeep. Someone who takes everything and everyone to heart."

"Kaiba-kun..."

"All foolish traits, yes, but you wouldn't be you without them."

She watched in wonder as his eyes flickered, just for an instant, with an unspeakable light of kindness.

His fingers released their hold on her arm and she almost shivered at the loss of warmth.

"Now. Go home. And forget about the midget."

Her blood boiled in indignation at the sudden change in tone, and she opened her mouth to give a scathing retort, then she suddenly understood; he was pushing her, in his own way, to find

herself again. Smiling in her mind, she answered loudly.

"Don't call him that. He's my best friend."

"I am happy for you. But I pity your children."

"Kaiba-kun." her eyebrow twitched menacingly.

"Don't you have your pathetic little group waiting for you at some or other place? Stop wasting my time." he turned and began walking away, smirking to himself as the last of her words

reached him.

"They're not pathetic! They're my friends!"

Her eyes shone with some of her old spirit as she smiled behind his retreating figure.

"Thank you, Kaiba-kun"

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo **Author's Notes: Here you go. Hope you liked it! This is for all my lovely reviewers! Thank you for all your support! **


	2. Limbo

**Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh, or any of the characters.**

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**Limbo**

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She tossed in her bed relentlessly. Her eyes refused to close, her heart refused to slow down.

It had been over two weeks since her encounter with him. His words echoed in her head making her breath catch.

"_You are a person with a heart too big for her own good; who takes everyone's safety and happiness to be her duty to upkeep. Someone who takes everything and everyone to heart..._

_All foolish traits...but you wouldn't be you without them."_

So what did that mean?

Coming from Seto Kaiba, it was without any doubt a compliment...or...ugh...she was so confused!

She thought harder, but only succeeded in giving herself a headache. That day that had started so badly...it somehow had lost its bitterness- and it was all thanks to him.

The odd, yet kind look he gave her when she had voiced her full reason for the request floated in her memory. It had permeated every single one of her moments since- even her dreams.

And then there was that: _"I thought so too..."_ he had spoken so softly.

She cringed thinking at how silly she must have looked then...even though he hadn't seemed to mind really...well...maybe a little.

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A little twinge in her heart told her she wasn't really ready to forget why she had wished to be like him in the first place. And as always Seto Kaiba had to be right!

It had been something to do with Yuugi. He had finally revealed that the Pharaoh had,indeed, held strong feelings for her; and stormed off without allowing her the chance to defend herself. She hurt. So much. His running off without wanting to hear that she couldn't have returned the Pharaoh's feelings anyway...because her heart belonged to him. His cold insinuations.

She knew her heart-it had beaten for the Pharaoh at some point, but she had realised that it was the boy in whom the Pharaoh resided-the kind, innocent sweet-hearted boy-who held her heart. And shattered it.

Tears began to slide down her face.

How could he have done that? She had always thought he would be one to listen to her...to believe in her...

It had been over two weeks and they hadn't spoken. Their once cozy group was now split...and she had no part in it. Of course, they hadn't kicked her out...but it wasn't like they exactly went out of her way to call her to lunch when they saw she was going in the opposite direction. They always expected her to do the first move: to apologise, to hold out her hands and bring the group back together. Not this time. She had just as much reason to be angry and hurt! Even more than Yuugi!

She sighed. This was all so stupid! Why did she still love him? How could she love someone who would think the worst of her at the drop of a hat? And...how long had he thought she was in love with the Pharaoh, anyway? The thought made her angry! How could he just assume that! He hadn't even asked her!

Her heart shrivelled a little more remembering the coldness in his usually kind eyes...the harsh words...more tears slipped from her closed eyes.

Part of her still loved him, though- still hoped that he would apologise...or at least give her a chance to explain herself.

Part of her, as always, looked on the bright side.

She sighed again. Yes, she still loved Yuugi...but it wasn't like before. Her heart had been tainted by the mark of betrayal- her feelings could never return to their original state; and so, she supposed, she would have to forget about them, him...everything.

The decision only served to sharpen her sense of loss- dreams, first love and a best-friend- all at once, and tears ran down her face even as sleep kindly came to claim her.

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**Author's Notes: Thank you to my reviewers**, **and a virtual cookie goes to Sxc-Saphire for being the first reviewer for this story. Also, thank you Neisha, senta 125, PsychoticTiger and blader540 for their kind reviews. Muchly appreciated! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. **


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